"I forgive you. I’m trying really hard to forgive you. When you’re done with me I'll still forgive you. You live in my every movement. I wouldn’t change a thing. Are these hands mine? Or my mothers? I want to be beautiful and androgynous but my mother’s hands weigh me down."
This is so beautiful and vulnerable. Thank you for this piece.
I feel this: "I don’t like myself as a mother. Well, said differently, I don’t like how much it’s stirred up in me. I am awakened by all of my complexities. My memories are a mind game to have to sift through. I feel I'm not good enough. I feel sweaty from the spotlight overhead. I want to escape. I am tired of everyones notes regarding my performance. I am unbearably complicated. I want to go to bed."
What a queasy ride we're on indeed. Really well said. Your voice is all yours!
I was going to quote a favorite line, something that really spoke to me, but I realized there are too many
"Could a man feel the same anger a woman feels? "
"My core is not as weak as I thought. My core used to house my children and now it houses my anger."
THIS. Been thinking a lot about how to channel my rage. Did you read this article in The Cut? https://www.thecut.com/2023/05/moms-gone-wild.html
This was such a good read. Thank you for sending! <3
Did it give you any ideas for channeling rage??
"I forgive you. I’m trying really hard to forgive you. When you’re done with me I'll still forgive you. You live in my every movement. I wouldn’t change a thing. Are these hands mine? Or my mothers? I want to be beautiful and androgynous but my mother’s hands weigh me down."
This is so beautiful and vulnerable. Thank you for this piece.
I feel this: "I don’t like myself as a mother. Well, said differently, I don’t like how much it’s stirred up in me. I am awakened by all of my complexities. My memories are a mind game to have to sift through. I feel I'm not good enough. I feel sweaty from the spotlight overhead. I want to escape. I am tired of everyones notes regarding my performance. I am unbearably complicated. I want to go to bed."
What a queasy ride we're on indeed. Really well said. Your voice is all yours!